The Case of the Missing Kidney

This morning, I went for a follow up ultrasound to check on the kidneys of our little guy. In our 20 week u/s, the tech didn't see the left kidney and Doc confirmed it wasn't in the usual spot (your abdomen) but that sometimes it can be found in the lower pelvic area which we would have to wait a few weeks to check on. After patiently answering many a question, assuring me that a) baby was totally healthy and would be absolutely fine b) there was nothing I did that caused the possible missing kidney, c) that it is not linked to any other abnormalities nor syndromes and d) that it does not mean anything about his life expectancy,  I resolved not to worry about it or even think (too much) about it until we knew for more certain. 

Which brings us back to today. The drive to St Joseph's Medical Plaza was surprisingly peaceful. I turned on my Christian radio station and began to sing along with praises to my King. Immediately, I was overcome. It was one of those moments. I could feel the presence of the Holy Spirit surrounding me, refreshing my soul and strengthening me from inside out. I was captivated by the beautiful sunshine, the striking clouds and blue skies that were filled with thunder, lightning and a downpour just a couple hours prior. I was even unaffected by the horrible traffic and Dean can tell you that if that were the case, it had to be the Holy Spirit at work! ha.

Totally unexpectedly I could feel my eyes well up with tears as I felt completely overwhelmed by His goodness and His love.  I felt joyful, humbled and simply grateful to be alive, to be in His grace and to have a precious life within me, the beautiful, miraculous outcome of Dean and my complete self-giving & life-giving love to one other. I turned my nervousness over to Him and committed every day of his life, every organ, every hair on my baby boy's head to His Creator. Then I got to the waiting room. That spiritual "high" feeling wore off a tad... The 15 minute wait seemed like an eternity. I felt nervous again. I wasn't worried. Honestly, I wasn't expecting to hear anything different. I guess it was just that impulse of  wanting needing to know. To be in control again. It was a very detailed ultrasound, much more in depth than the standard check in the Dr's office, or at least it seemed to be. She took her time measuring every major bone and checking blood flow from here and there. I'm sure she left the "kidney search" to the very end purposely, for her sake, as to not have some basket-case uncooperative mom on her hands. 

But I was fine. She did only see 1 kidney but apparently he's got some damn long legs and an adorably cute profile!  :) She asked if my husband was tall because compared to the other measurements, I guess his femur measured very long. Hmm, future track star?! We shall see.

I'm still not worried. Really. None of the medical professionals are so why should I be? And worrying isn't from the Lord anyway. He has put us in this situation for a reason and He wants us to trust Him evermore. All I'm called to do as a mother is to love and teach my children in the ways of the Lord, and through my example, striving every day for holiness and oneness with Him and He will take care of the rest. 

That simplifies everything.

And in the words of my wise, awesome, pro-life Dr., "Besides, God doesn't care what our shell looks like or how it functions. All he cares about is our soul, what's in our heart. We'll get a new body in heaven anyway" I love that.

So with that, here is baby Soren. Looks like he's got the full lips gene, just like big(gest) sis. 

 And this would be him showing off his male genitals
(not where the arrow is pointing, in between the legs, people). 

Those boys. They have no shame. haha.