Window View

For the last 7 years of my career working in the aerospace industry, I supported proprietary programs which meant living working in buildings with no visual access to the outside world. I always fantasized about a "window view".  A view of anything, really. A tree, some blue skies, heck even another building. 

Well, this morning while I was cleaning up in the kitchen and washing the dishes after breakfast, I realized I had a better view than from any office or cubicle window, better than our Dana Point oceanfront view from our time share condo, a better view than of any "wonder of the world"(not to say I wouldn't like to visit/see them)

And although I've been feeling a little tired and running low on patience and endurance recently, I felt so incredibly blessed today. I know I've said it many times before but today was one of those days where I really felt it and so, I must say it again...

I love my job, I love my home, I love my family and I love this view.

(Dean, thank you for going through so much including much interior agony to make this happen. I never thought I would land a job that I could honestly say I love and about which I could feel so joyful, passionate and alive!
And Dad, thank you for creating a place for me that I can call my little "dream home", and a home for my children where they have so many special and favorite places to play, to run, to learn, to call their own so that we never seem to get tired of our home. You are truly amazing!)

(Playing in her favorite spot as of late: a little pit hole of dirt that needs some patching from our recent sprinkler installations)

The Case of the Missing Kidney

This morning, I went for a follow up ultrasound to check on the kidneys of our little guy. In our 20 week u/s, the tech didn't see the left kidney and Doc confirmed it wasn't in the usual spot (your abdomen) but that sometimes it can be found in the lower pelvic area which we would have to wait a few weeks to check on. After patiently answering many a question, assuring me that a) baby was totally healthy and would be absolutely fine b) there was nothing I did that caused the possible missing kidney, c) that it is not linked to any other abnormalities nor syndromes and d) that it does not mean anything about his life expectancy,  I resolved not to worry about it or even think (too much) about it until we knew for more certain. 

Which brings us back to today. The drive to St Joseph's Medical Plaza was surprisingly peaceful. I turned on my Christian radio station and began to sing along with praises to my King. Immediately, I was overcome. It was one of those moments. I could feel the presence of the Holy Spirit surrounding me, refreshing my soul and strengthening me from inside out. I was captivated by the beautiful sunshine, the striking clouds and blue skies that were filled with thunder, lightning and a downpour just a couple hours prior. I was even unaffected by the horrible traffic and Dean can tell you that if that were the case, it had to be the Holy Spirit at work! ha.

Totally unexpectedly I could feel my eyes well up with tears as I felt completely overwhelmed by His goodness and His love.  I felt joyful, humbled and simply grateful to be alive, to be in His grace and to have a precious life within me, the beautiful, miraculous outcome of Dean and my complete self-giving & life-giving love to one other. I turned my nervousness over to Him and committed every day of his life, every organ, every hair on my baby boy's head to His Creator. Then I got to the waiting room. That spiritual "high" feeling wore off a tad... The 15 minute wait seemed like an eternity. I felt nervous again. I wasn't worried. Honestly, I wasn't expecting to hear anything different. I guess it was just that impulse of  wanting needing to know. To be in control again. It was a very detailed ultrasound, much more in depth than the standard check in the Dr's office, or at least it seemed to be. She took her time measuring every major bone and checking blood flow from here and there. I'm sure she left the "kidney search" to the very end purposely, for her sake, as to not have some basket-case uncooperative mom on her hands. 

But I was fine. She did only see 1 kidney but apparently he's got some damn long legs and an adorably cute profile!  :) She asked if my husband was tall because compared to the other measurements, I guess his femur measured very long. Hmm, future track star?! We shall see.

I'm still not worried. Really. None of the medical professionals are so why should I be? And worrying isn't from the Lord anyway. He has put us in this situation for a reason and He wants us to trust Him evermore. All I'm called to do as a mother is to love and teach my children in the ways of the Lord, and through my example, striving every day for holiness and oneness with Him and He will take care of the rest. 

That simplifies everything.

And in the words of my wise, awesome, pro-life Dr., "Besides, God doesn't care what our shell looks like or how it functions. All he cares about is our soul, what's in our heart. We'll get a new body in heaven anyway" I love that.

So with that, here is baby Soren. Looks like he's got the full lips gene, just like big(gest) sis. 

 And this would be him showing off his male genitals
(not where the arrow is pointing, in between the legs, people). 

Those boys. They have no shame. haha.

Happy St Patrick's Day!

"Christ shield me this day: Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me, Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ on my right, Christ on my left, Christ when I lie down, Christ when I arise, Christ in the heart of every person who thinks of me, Christ in the eye that sees me, Christ in the ear that hears me" 

(Prayer from "The Breastplate of St. Patrick") 

  

First of all, I can't believe it's been a whole year since this post. I remember taking those shots and writing that post like it were yesterday. Ok, maybe not yesterday, but you know what I mean. Anyway, do you know why we do anything differently today? Why we might say "Happy St Patty's day" to one another or why we might wear green and eat festive different foods? Yup, it's that darn Catholic Church again and one of her most famous Saints. I think everyone who celebrates today in one way or another should know the reason for the grocery stores filled with green exotic flowers and dyed, scrumptious cookies. Do, read on...

St Patrick (415?-493?)

Legends about Patrick abound; but truth is best served by our seeing two solid qualities in him: He was humble and he was courageous. The determination to accept suffering and success with equal indifference guided the life of God's instrument for winning most of Ireland for Christ.

Details of his life are uncertain. Current research places his dates of birth and death a little later than earlier accounts. Patrick may have been born in Dunbarton, Scotland, Cumberland, England, or in northern Wales. He called himself both a Roman and a Briton. At 16, he and a large number of his father's slaves and vassals were captured by Irish raiders and sold as slaves in Ireland. Forced to work as a shepherd, he suffered greatly from hunger and cold.

After six years, Patrick escaped, probably to France, and later returned to Britain at the age of 22. His captivity had meant spiritual conversion. He may have studied at Lerins, off the French coast; he spent years at Auxerre, France, and was consecrated bishop at the age of 43. His great desire was to proclaim the Good News to the Irish.

In a dream vision it seemed "all the children of Ireland from their mothers' wombs were stretching out their hands" to him. He understood the vision to be a call to do mission work in pagan Ireland. Despite opposition from those who felt his education had been defective, he was sent to carry out the task. He went to the west and north, where the faith had never been preached, obtained the protection of local kings and made numerous converts.

Because of the island's pagan background, Patrick was emphatic in encouraging widows to remain chaste and young women to consecrate their virginity to Christ. He ordained many priests, divided the country into dioceses, held Church councils, founded several monasteries and continually urged his people to greater holiness in Christ.

He suffered much opposition from pagan druids, and was criticized in both England and Ireland for the way he conducted his mission.

In a relatively short time the island had experienced deeply the Christian spirit, and was prepared to send out missionaries whose efforts were greatly responsible for Christianizing Europe.

Patrick was a man of action, with little inclination toward learning. He had a rocklike belief in his vocation, in the cause he had espoused.

One of the few certainly authentic writings is his Confessio, above all an act of homage to God for having called Patrick, unworthy sinner, to the apostolate.

There is hope rather than irony in the fact that his burial place is said to be in strife-torn Ulster, in County Down.

What distinguishes Patrick is the durability of his efforts. When one considers the state of Ireland when he began his mission work, the vast extent of his labors (all of Ireland) and how the seeds he planted continued to grow and flourish, one can only admire the kind of man Patrick must have been. The holiness of a person is known only by the fruits of his or her work.

(This entry appears in the print edition of Saint of the Day.) 

working hard at collecting  weeds shamrocks...

                                                   

  And of course, this was the best (& only) shot I got of them together! Aye caramba! 

Hope you didn't get pinched today!